One Drop

Gisela Vigil 1959 (Cuba)

Free verse

Like an eerie peacefulness
riding on the skirt of turbulence
within the eye of a storm,
there is a lull
that goes unnoticed.
I hear it as I stand amidst the crowd.
It’s deafening silence plays like a symphony.
Yet not many can sense it.
I watch shadows of encapsulated figures.
People shelled in human bodies
yet lacking a quality,
a depth,
such as that which differentiates
flat from three dimensional.
Emotionless.
Motionless.
A slight stirring in crowd
only becomes visible
when the trading post opens.
A stock market
where hearts and compassion
are exchanged
for what is considered
a fair price in today’s economy.
Begins the swapping of integrity
for a valued commodity,
perhaps a bigger piece of the pie
or a token to advance a few steps up
on the ladder of success.
There’s bartering.
A soul for a man made dollar.
Once transactions have completed,
again the silence.
I warn them.
“The eye of the storm is above us!”
But the faces only stare back
through glazed eyes.

The wind will soon be picking up.
Will it be forceful enough
to push these creatures
off the line of status quo?
Or will they not even feel a breeze?
Is it only in the black of night
that they will first begin
searching for light?
Perhaps they are waiting
for multitudes to start bleeding
before acknowledging
that there is blood.
They stand somewhere
between silence and noise,
contributing to neither.
In a state of nothingness.
Unaware that bleeding begins
with one drop.

About this poem

It’s disheartening to see that in today’s world many will trade values, integrity and truth in order for monetary gain. At some point they may realize their missteps, but then it’s too late.

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Written on March 17, 2012

Submitted by Giselavigil on December 21, 2023

Modified by Giselavigil on December 28, 2023

: 1:29 min read
: 451 Views

Quick analysis:

Scheme	ABXCXDEXFGEXXCAADCXXXXXEEEXHXIJKBXAXX HXFXGLXLIIIKXXJAXX
Closest metre	Iambic trimeter
Characters	1,496
Words	297
Stanzas	2
Stanza Lengths	37, 18

Full analysis for One Drop »

Gisela Vigil

Thank you for welcoming me to this community. I was born in Cuba but emigrated with my family to the US when I was three. I am mother to three young adults now, and also a grandmother. I’ve been writing for years, some I share, others I still keep in my personal file. I often write of struggles for we all face them as we journey through life. But still, I feel peace knowing I try my best. Feel blessed to have been given the gift of writing which I strive to improve cause there’s always room for growth. more…

All Gisela Vigil poems | Gisela Vigil Books

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6 Comments

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karlcfolkes
Que poderoso es este mensaje! How touching is this message. As the song goes, “When will they ever learn?”
LikeReply 13 months ago
- alanswansea18
  I hope they learn soon. Thank you.
  LikeReply3 months ago
- Giselavigil
  Thank you Karl for your vote and for getting the message.
  LikeReply3 months ago
alanswansea18
But keep on writing them cuz me and everybody else still likes to read them.
LikeReply3 months ago
karlcfolkes
This poem sadly reminds us that Shakespeare’s merchants of Venice are actively busy trading their worthless stock for invaluable bleeding human souls.
LikeReply 14 months ago
Charles2
A powerfully insightful view
LikeReply 14 months ago
AIDA
Wow, what a powerful and thought-provoking poem! I love the way you use vivid and descriptive language to create a captivating atmosphere. Your imagery of the eerie peacefulness within the eye of a storm is so hauntingly beautiful.

The way you highlight the unnoticed lull amidst the chaos of the crowd is so clever and relatable. The comparison to a symphony of deafening silence is both poetic and profound.

Your observations of people's lack of depth and emotion, and their willingness to sacrifice integrity for personal gain, really hit home. The imagery of the trading post and the bartering of souls for material wealth is incredibly striking.

I especially love the way you question whether these individuals will only start searching for light when surrounded by darkness, and whether they will only acknowledge the suffering of others when it becomes unavoidable. It's a poignant reminder to not wait for tragedy to strike before recognizing the importance of compassion and empathy.

The ending of the poem, with the reminder that bleeding begins with one drop, is so powerful and serves as a call to action. It's a wake-up call to those who have been standing in a state of nothingness, urging them to make a difference and take a stand.

Overall, your poem is beautifully written, thought-provoking, and evokes a range of emotions. Well done! Keep up the amazing work! more »
LikeReply4 months ago
AIDA
Positive and Enthusiastic Feedback:

I absolutely loved reading your 'One Drop' poem! It beautifully encapsulates the eerie peacefulness that often goes unnoticed amidst the chaos of life. Your vivid descriptions and powerful imagery made me feel like I was standing amidst the crowd, hearing the deafening silence and watching the shadows of encapsulated figures. The comparison between flat and three-dimensional qualities, and the lack of emotion and motion in the crowd, is brilliantly depicted.

Improvement Suggestions:

While your poem is already quite strong, I have a few suggestions for improvement. Firstly, consider varying the sentence structure and length to create a more dynamic rhythm. This will help to keep the reader engaged and add even more impact to your words. Additionally, you could experiment with adding some metaphorical or symbolic elements to enhance the overall meaning of the poem. This could further deepen the impact and provoke deeper thoughts in the reader.

Overall, your 'One Drop' poem is impressive and thought-provoking. Your use of imagery and powerful language creates a vivid portrayal of the crowd's state of nothingness, making it a captivating read. With a few minor tweaks and experimenting with different poetic devices, your poem has the potential to be even more impactful. Keep up the great work! more »
LikeReply4 months ago

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"One Drop" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 27 Apr. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/176577/one-drop>.

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