How are you

I've began to dread the question.
"How are you?"
You don't want the truth.
If you did, is it out of concern.
or just something for you to talk about?
Do you really want the truth?
I'm stuck in darkness,
grasped tightly to the sliver of light I see
seems like these days everyone is moving.
but I stand still, motionless.
If I told you the truth would you really listen?
I highly doubt there's any true emotions behind the question.
Are you asking for something to talk about?
No one wanted to hear that I am succumbing to the sadness.
They all just expect there to be no real emotions anymore.
Grief doesn't just evaporate into thin air.
Some days it swallows you,
consumes every breath you take.
other days you smile at the thought of a memory,
just glad to have that to hold on to.
Today is a day I come up for air,
but slip back under the surface quickly.
Yesterday I laughed and felt normal,
It's like a see saw.
up and down, up and down..

But, if you asked me,
"How are you?"
I'd reply...
"I'm fine, thank you."