Analysis of Package Tour To Heaven

David Gabriel Caplan 1948 (Glasgow)



I booked a holiday to Heaven
the brochure looked inviting
no drunken louts or cell phones
pollution free, no fighting

But what a shock awaits you
in this "Goody Goody" Hell
all the food is vegan
and there's censorship as well

No smoking, No drinking
No animals allowed
(you can get away with kissing
if you sneak behind a cloud)

You're expected to say prayers
morning, noon and night
and the dress code never varies;
everyone wears white

When I wanted to complain
about how the place was run
they took me to the bosses;
an old bugger and his son

I told them with defiance
my holiday was hell
and I'd never ever come again
but I guess they knew that well !


Scheme ABXB XCAC BDBD XEXE XAXA XCXC
Poetic Form Quatrain 
Metre 11010110 0011010 1101111 0101110 1101011 0110101 101110 011011 110110 110001 11101110 1110101 1010111 10101 00111010 1011 1110101 0110111 1111010 1110011 1111010 11011 011010101 1111111
Closest metre Iambic trimeter
Characters 642
Words 124
Sentences 1
Stanzas 6
Stanza Lengths 4, 4, 4, 4, 4, 4
Lines Amount 24
Letters per line (avg) 22
Words per line (avg) 5
Letters per stanza (avg) 88
Words per stanza (avg) 21
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Submitted on September 27, 2020

Modified on March 05, 2023

38 sec read
18

David Gabriel Caplan

Brought up by a Jewish father and a French Catholic mother. Both of whom relegated religion to the category of " fairy tales." I thank them for their wisdom. I have had several interesting jobs in my life, both in the UK and in Australia, but the last 27 years before I retired were spent as a University Print Manager. I have been writing poetry since a child. My main interest is in Humour and Flash Fiction. I have one book to my credit, with two others which I am too lazy to do anything about! more…

All David Gabriel Caplan poems | David Gabriel Caplan Books

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