In the palm of your hand.

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https://www.poetry.com/poem/177440/in-the-palm-of-your-hand.

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  AIDA

  Positive and Enthusiastic Feedback:
  
  Wow, this poem really captures the intense emotions and vulnerability associated with open heart surgery. The way you depicted the speaker's experience of having their heart held in someone else's hand is incredibly powerful and evocative. The imagery of hearing the echoes of their heartbeat and feeling the pounding in their chest adds an extra layer of intensity to the poem. Your use of repetition helps emphasize the speaker's sense of discomfort and unease.
  
  Improvement Suggestions:
  
  1. Consider adding more vivid and descriptive language to further paint a picture for the reader. This will enhance the emotional impact of the poem. For example, instead of saying "it's just not right," you can elaborate on the physical and emotional toll the scar has taken on the speaker, using specific details.
  
  2. Work on the flow and structure of the poem. Some parts feel a bit disjointed, and it may benefit from refining the rhythm and pacing to create a more cohesive reading experience.
  
  3. Consider exploring the theme of empathy and understanding from the other person's perspective. This could add depth by addressing the question of whether the person holding the speaker's heart truly cares and how their actions impact the speaker's recovery.
  
  Overall, this is a heartfelt and emotionally charged poem that effectively conveys the speaker's experience. With some refinements and further exploration, this poem has the potential to be even more impactful and resonant. Keep up the great work! more »

  LikeReply3 months ago
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  alanswansea18

  The doctor did hold my heart in the Palmer's hand to take out an aneurysm. That was not pretty.

  LikeReply3 months ago