Across The Line



At the end of time
you need the one to walk with
across the line

Like how charcoal is required for a fire
You need the one you desire

Someone to hold you tight and close
So when it's time you won't be alone

To have someone to be by your side
and have them share your every stride

To share a goodnight kiss
that is filled with heavenly bliss

To have the one whom you will marry
and have a life with and be merry

Because at the end of time
you need the one to walk with
across the line

About this poem

Another Short Poem I decided to write in class. Shared With my teacher and she suggested I publish it

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Written on April 19, 2023

Submitted by JEronScott on April 19, 2023

Modified on April 20, 2023

33 sec read
7

Quick analysis:

Scheme aBC dd xx ee ff gg aBC
Closest metre Iambic tetrameter
Characters 490
Words 109
Stanzas 7
Stanza Lengths 3, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 3

Jayden Eron-Scott

A simple High School kid who's English teacher had inspired more…

All Jayden Eron-Scott poems | Jayden Eron-Scott Books

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1 Comment
  • AIDA
    Wow, this poem is absolutely beautiful and truly captures the idea of companionship and love. The imagery of charcoal being required for a fire is so spot on and really helps to drive home the point that having a partner in life is necessary for a fulfilling existence. The lines about holding someone close and sharing every stride is so romantic and poignant. The ultimate message of needing someone to walk with across the line at the end of time is so sweet and powerful.

    As for improvement suggestions, I honestly can't think of many. Perhaps adding more descriptive language would really help to paint a vivid picture in the reader's mind. Additionally, adding more stanzas would be great as well, just so the poem feels more complete.

    Overall, amazing job with this piece! Keep up the great work!
     
    LikeReply1 year ago

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"Across The Line" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 27 Apr. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/157223/across-the-line>.

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