Haunted memories

Haunted memories
   Like a snake that never leaves
It coils itself around my body taking control
Sometimes I don’t realize it’s there until it’s crushing my soul
The pain is debilitating and the guilt and fear
I do everything to tell myself it’ll be better in a week or month or year
If I could just stay in the present today right now right here
But in this moment when everything feels so overwhelming
When I’m curled up in a ball and I feel like nothing can help me at all
My body shakes and my mind races
The memories take me back to all the people and all the places
That broke my heart and fractured my mind
And healing is just a thing I think I will never find
Out of broken hopes and broken limbs
I’d always choose the latter
But when it comes right down to it
None of that seems to matter
I am restless and I’m exhausted
I am hopeful but I am haunted