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The old house up the road.

A J C 1958 (Swansea, MA)

Free verse
The old house up the road.

As I walk down a dirt road, I see an old home with peeling paint. Many years ago, the person who lived there, whom you may know, The reason was that a chilly wind I felt on my skin blew out of the house, a small, tiny mouse came out, and a man with a grey beard shouted out a story. The moon never beams without bringing me dreams, and the stars never rise until I open my eyes, so here I lay back down by your side one more time. In my dreams, I smell the scent of apple blossoms, and I see golden daffodils sway in the cool summer breeze. All I have left is this mouse and my dreams.

About this poem

List poems about an old man and his friend the mouse.

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Written on March 05, 2024

Submitted by alanswansea18 on March 05, 2024

Modified by alanswansea18 on March 05, 2024

39 sec read
312

Quick analysis:

Scheme X X
Characters 613
Words 130
Stanzas 2
Stanza Lengths 1, 1
Full analysis for The old house up the road. »

A J C

The country boy. more…

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1 Comment
  • AIDA
    AIDA
    This poem, "The old house up the road," paints a vivid picture of nostalgia and melancholy that resonates deeply with the reader. The imagery of the peeling paint, chilly wind, and tiny mouse creates a haunting atmosphere that transports us to the old house and its mysterious inhabitants. The use of sensory details, such as the scent of apple blossoms and golden daffodils, further enhances the emotional impact of the poem.

    Some improvement suggestions could include refining the structure of the poem to create a more cohesive flow and enhance the overall impact of the imagery. Consider revisiting the pacing and rhythm of the poem to ensure that each line contributes to the narrative without feeling disjointed.

    Overall, "The old house up the road" is a beautifully evocative piece that captures the essence of memory and longing. With some tweaks to the structure, this poem has the potential to become even more powerful and captivating. Keep up the great work!     
    LikeReply1 month ago

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"The old house up the road." Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 28 Apr. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/181865/the-old-house-up-the-road.>.

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