The stellar wind



The stellar wind in vacant sails,
Ripping through skin and meat,
And grinding bones to dust entails
For sake of new world kneading.

It`s tasteless and its colors range,
Beyond the grasp of feeble sight,
It`s unbiased and without grade,
There is no directing of flight.

And it`s the wind are only in a words,
In fact, it`s more a flow.
So floundering amidst these waves,
You find a seed of glow,

From shot right through - sobbing -
Of chaotic stream corpuscles,
And the pupil is dappled, pitted,
And vibrate even every muscles.

        ------------------------

Звёздный ветер в ничьих парусах,
Раздирающий кожу и мясо
И стирающий кости во прах
Ради нового мира замеса,


Он безвкусен и спектр цветовой
Неподвластен убогому зренью,
И бесстрастен, не добрый - не злой
И отсутствует суть направленья.


Да и ветер-то лишь на словах,
А на деле - скорее теченье.
И барахтаясь в этих волнах,
Обретаешь крупицу свеченья


От прострела навылет - навзрыд -
Хаотичным потоком корпускул,
И зрачок испещрён, изрыт,
И вибрирует каждый мускул.

About this poem

This poem is a translation I made of my Russian original.

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Written on January 24, 2024

Submitted by Ulenspiegel on March 05, 2024

Modified by Ulenspiegel on March 06, 2024

1:00 min read
25

Quick analysis:

Scheme AXAB XCXC XDXD BAXX
Closest metre Iambic dimeter
Characters 1,405
Words 203
Stanzas 8
Stanza Lengths 4, 4, 4, 4, 4, 4, 4, 4

Discuss the poem The stellar wind with the community...

2 Comments
  • AIDA
    Wow, what a captivating and thought-provoking poem "The stellar wind" is! The imagery is vivid and the language is beautifully poetic. I love the way you explore the idea of a powerful force shaping a new world, and the sense of awe and mystery that it evokes.

    Some suggestions for improvement may include simplifying some phrases or images to make the meaning clearer to the reader. Also, consider refining the structure of the poem to enhance the flow and rhythm, which will make it even more engaging to read aloud.

    Overall, this is a wonderful piece of writing that really draws the reader in. Keep up the great work and continue exploring new ideas and themes in your poetry!
     
    LikeReply1 month ago
  • Ulenspiegel
    Звёздный ветер в ничьих парусах,
    Раздирающий ко�
    у и мясо
    И стирающий кости во прах
    Ради нового мира замеса,

    Он безвкусен и спектр цветовой
    Неподвластен убогому зренью,
    И бесстрастен, не добрый - не злой
    И отсутствует суть направленья.

    Да и ветер-то лишь на словах,
    А на деле - скорее теченье.
    И барахтаясь в этих волнах,
    Обретаешь крупицу свеченья

    От прострела навылет - навзрыд -
    Хаотичным потоком корпускул,
    И зрачок испещрён, изрыт,
    И вибрирует ка�
    дый мускул.
     
    LikeReply1 month ago

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"The stellar wind" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 27 Apr. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/181860/the-stellar-wind>.

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