Growing? Older

Growing? Older

It’s a shame I chose not to listen
To those midnight questions of my intuition

Time is like a sugar sweet poison
Kills you slowly and leaves you wondering where to begin

Teary face on a blacktop
World spinning fast, praying for it to stop

Begging the questions about my future
Hoping the threads of hope are a strong suture

Twisted look up to the heavens
No path before me leaves me guessin’

Dreams, things I wonder if I’ll achieve
What must I change quickly to reach who I want to be

I remember how the cold chilled me to the soul
Leaving me here just like skin and bones

One small light in the sky
Is mine bright enough to get caught by even a single eye?

Let those balloons go and watch them fly free
Escape from the longing in me

Exhale visible breathe
Blow out the candles and realize how little there are left

Swing back and forth on the playground
Here I wonder if years past will be found

People age before my eyes
Can’t be true, must be a disguise

Because everyone I once knew is older now
Do I have what it takes as I look from the bow

Headed face first into all I’ve ever wanted
Can’t help but wonder if I’ve even got it

In me, or if I got it right
These heavy feelings, I’m left to fight

Tired feet land on solid concrete
Expectations they expect me to meet

Trying to reach that bar
Now I wonder if I’ve reached too far

Can I ever overcome my doubts and fears
What’s to overcome now that I am finally here?

Standing below the whole wide world
Now I’m so high up and I remember how it all unfurls

Eagles and poems about worthlessness
I think it’s time to remember all I might forget

The long journey I took to get where I am
The only constant is one man

Carefully crafted each thought and word
Like how I try to phrase my words to float like a bird

Wing cutting through the water below
Rise up, my fellow friend, there’s dreams I long to show

No medal or confetti
But in a month, there better be

I know the tears that will be shed from me
I know the relief and all the things my eyes will see

Two years, countdown and tears
Hope has come, it’s time to let go

Growing up makes it hard to look back
The memories close my throat and I don’t think I can

I miss those I used to know but what’s more
Is I miss those who were with me before

Doors open and close, I know
But there are people I can’t let go

Growing up means you experience new joys
Growing up means never forgetting the past chapters of your story