Rate:5.0 / 7 votes

Cold Camper

Beverly Laskowski 1986 (Texas)

December 23 
                      Will you go outside,
                       look up,
                       and tell me what you see?



You are all of these.
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Written on December 03, 2023

Submitted by Bev11 on December 03, 2023

Modified by Bev11 on January 10, 2024

6 sec read
363

Quick analysis:

Scheme XXX X
Closest metre Iambic dimeter
Characters 149
Words 23
Stanzas 2
Stanza Lengths 3, 1
Full analysis for Cold Camper »

Beverly Laskowski

Primarily raised in East Texas. Wife and mother of two. I'm a nurse who focuses on matters of the heart. more…

All Beverly Laskowski poems | Beverly Laskowski Books

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Discuss the poem Cold Camper with the community...

7 Comments
  • luisestable1
    luisestable1
    A very concise poem. All of these brings to the mind what one put to the imagination and this is the heart of the poem and its more powerful aspect.
    Good read!
    LikeReply3 months ago
    • Bev11
      Bev11
      Thank you!
      LikeReply3 months ago
  • RonaldBunch
    RonaldBunch
    Just amazing
    LikeReply3 months ago
    • Bev11
      Bev11
      Thank you!
      LikeReply3 months ago
  • karlcfolkes
    karlcfolkes
    Unstated message: “The sky is the limit.” NICE!
    LikeReply3 months ago
    • Bev11
      Bev11
      Thank you!
      LikeReply3 months ago
  • Symmetry60
    Symmetry60
    Typo - *and*
    LikeReply3 months ago
  • Symmetry60
    Symmetry60
    Ironically, I voted for the second shortest poem in the contest, The Raven, by John May. This, however, is an excellent poem an equal to the task. Such profundity in so few words. That spells wisdom to this man. Thank you for sharing your gift. 
    LikeReply3 months ago
    • Bev11
      Bev11
      Thank you!
      LikeReply3 months ago
  • Jewoo525
    Jewoo525
    At first, I thought it was a Haiku! Either way, I was very glad to see a concise poem submitted to the contest. It is hard to write a poem with fewer words than more, yes, but I think it's harder to have the courage to submit these shorter-form pieces into the contest as well- so extra props for that.

    In such a few words, you can conjure up excellent imagery! The reader is immediately able to see an image that their heart is drawn to. This fact, paired with the title, naturally guides the reader to think of a night sky filled with stars- although the association isn't forced by any means. This is supported by the choice of phrases gently "suggesting" rather than "commanding," which invokes an inclination for the reader's imagination to comply.

    Truly excellent writing and a lesson in disciplined word choice/phrasing. I would love to see more of your work in the future, please keep competing. Keep writing!     
    LikeReply 13 months ago
    • Bev11
      Bev11
      Thank you for your feedback. Will do!
      LikeReply3 months ago
  • Stephaniemonet21
    Stephaniemonet21
    This is the shortest poem in this contest, yet it struck me so hard. I felt it to my core - it truly made me feel. Thank you for writing something so beautiful with so few words.
    LikeReply3 months ago
    • Bev11
      Bev11
      Thank you!
      LikeReply3 months ago

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"Cold Camper" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 27 Apr. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/178126/cold-camper>.

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