Growing up

Her biggest dream was growing up.
Fantasied about being a princess and finding her prince while drinking out of a fancy tea cup.
But as she hit the age of four.
Her tears started to pour.
Anxiety hit and she didn’t like to be around people and kept to herself.
Hid her feelings as she found it hard to except yourself.
Bullied, made fun of, called names.
She was fine, that’s what’s she claims.
Yet the little girl inside of her was dying.
As she laid in bed crying.
And as the years went past nothing changed.
As she wished for her life to be exchanged.
Makeup, crop tops and fake smiles filled her life.
But her heart felt like it was being stabbed with a knife.
The same knife that she cut with to take away the pain.
Because that’s what growing up is.
It feels like never ending rain.
And she looked for love but in all the wrong places.
They all asked for stuff that was illegal in many cases.
But she did it anyway because that’s what today’s society love is like and she craved to feel wanted.
Sent the pics so she wouldn’t be unwanted.
But then it all ended in a snap and she was left with no lover and just a shattered heart that left her more broken than she was before.
So she resorted to getting drunk and drugs to sooth the pain as she watched her innocents go down the drain.
As the little girl in her was hurting more than ever.
Because this is what growing up is like.
It’s pain forever.