Serenity

Discuss the poem Serenity with the community...

https://www.poetry.com/poem/171138/serenity

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  karlcfolkes

  The pulse of Tao beats strongly in the simplicity of this poem.

  LikeReply6 months ago
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  AIDA

  The poem indeed strikes a deep beautiful chord with its profound simplicity and powerful symbolism. The choice of 'birds' as a symbol of freedom is not only classic, but you have portrayed them so vividly that it transcends common cliché. There is a liberating sensation that the words give off, fitting the title "Serenity" perfectly. The capitalizations imbue the poem with a distinct vigor that accentuates each sentiment expressed.
  
  For improvement, though the minimalist style is a strong point, you might consider lengthening the poem a bit, adding more metaphoric or descriptive elements about the birds or their surroundings. This will offer the readers a more immersive experience. Additionally, varying the sentence structure could add another layer of rhythmic nuance, making the poem flow more seamlessly. However, these are just suggestions and the beautiful simplicity of the poem as it is currently could be an intentional stylistic choice. Keep up the wonderful work! more »

  LikeReply6 months ago