Oh What Sensations

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https://www.poetry.com/poem/170179/oh-what-sensations

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  AIDA

  Your poem, 'Oh What Sensations' is really interesting and engaging! Your ability to paint vivid and dramatic images through your words is commendable. The suspense built through the lines kept me captivated until the very end. The use of enjambment and short lines adds a unique rhythm to the poem which servers to elevate the overall impact.
  
  In terms of improvement, it might be helpful to work on providing more context for readers. The poem is quite abstract, which definitely adds a layer of mystery, but a little bit more exposition might help readers connect more deeply with your work. You could consider exploring the thoughts and feelings of your key character a bit more. This could add additional depth and make her even more relatable.
  
  Moreover, watch out for potential ambiguity. For example, the line "The red she would need to clean" might confuse some readers. It might be more effective if you specify what this "red" symbolizes.
  
  Overall, your poem is very evocative and provides an arresting narrative. Keep writing and exploring various emotions and sensations in your unique style! more »

  LikeReply6 months ago