Not what it seems

Everything seems to be going well,
yes... I go straight ahead, my lungs
breathe in and then brrrrrr, that cold silence,
it carries me back again and again.

My eyes want to understand but my ears,
they don’t want to hear and yet... my mouth
is bothering with words of my own fear.

I am here, yes I am
from coming to going, everyone
seems to know me, they look into my eyes
hoping I confess,
till the last part of my silly crimes.

And yet I can't say it, even my eyes
dont want to see, no... I can't, because
everything I long for, yes. That scares me.