Now

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https://www.poetry.com/poem/166449/now

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  AIDA

  Positive and Enthusiastic Feedback:
  This is a very compelling piece! Your poem tackles a heavy theme with an admirable lightness. The paradox of being overwhelmed by the present to the point where it clouds both past and future is a deeply resonating concept. It's poignant, beautifully expressed, and thought-provoking. The succinctness of the poem actually amplifies its substance, spotlighting your ability to create an impact with few words. Very powerful!
  
  Improvement Suggestions:
  While this poem beautifully encapsulates a sense of being overwhelmed by the present, it might be interesting to extend it a bit further to explore what specific aspects of the "now" are causing such a strong reaction. Also, considering the addition of some figurative language may heighten the emotional quotient of the poem. Lastly, the poem can benefit from a bit of restructuring. The line 'I'm seeing too much now' gives away a lot immediately, maybe unveiling this slowly might add to the suspense of your piece. Keep up the great work! more »

  LikeReply8 months ago