Loving an addict

Life is a journey that has its ups and downs It can bring you to tears or bring you joy all around. The path we take can cause us heartache or bring us laughter. The tears we shed can release the pain or make us angry. The laughter can allow us to forget the pain for a moment; however, the little moments are the memories we cherish, but the hurtful memories stay in our heads asking ourselves “WHY?”
Why do we fall in love with the wrong people? The people we think are the one to spend our lives with forever. Does the pain ever end, or the regrets that we feel? Will we ever trust or find love in our hearts again?

Love is pain and Pain is Love because it drives us crazy whether it is a broken heart or getting our favorite tattoo. The tears still come up, and we try to hold them back, but sometimes these emotions get too heavy for our hearts, and we must release the pain. The pain takes our breath away, and we need to scream.

On A beach trip, we need to feel the sun and ocean breeze on our faces. When we love someone so much that we want the best for them that we try anything. We cry, pray, and love them until it turns into anger or resentment.
All we want is for that person to see you and love you the same way or the potential they have in themselves.

Is it real love you feel, or is it the potential you see in that person that you love? Will he ever change or the pain end, or do we walk away forever? When all you want to do is cry out for the person and make them feel your pain, so they can understand how you really feel. Love is not supposed to be this way, or am I dreaming or watching a love story movie. Is my heart too soft, or am I stupid to think a man can love me the same way I love. All I want to do is scream, shout, cry, and drop to my knees and say “WHY”? All I ever wanted is for him to give me the same love and not take me for granted. I wanted him to just come home, but instead he chose a different path I can’t follow. All the revengeful anger built up rendered me to make choices that were out of my character.

The tears still fall down my face and I can’t breathe, but I will push forward and carry on with life. The good and bad memories will be with me forever. I will cherish all the laughter we shared and occasionally laugh through the tears. Yes, my heart has hardened, and I will never love another, for I gave him all me and there is nothing left but a bitter woman.

 I hope he finds happiness and all his dreams come true. Entities of earth watch over him and show him the light because all my love I gave him brought me pain. I am just sorry that my love was not enough.