Safe Place No More

I used to think
Sleep was a magical thing.
A haven where my dreams
Could softly float me to safety
Until the inevitable morning arrived.
I used to think
Sleep was a peaceful time.
A place where I didn't
Need to worry about daytime things.
But the interlude hurt me more
By demanding my subconscious mind's attention
To force me to relive
All the atrocities I've lived through.
I used to think
Sleep was a home for me.
A space where I finally could feel
Happy again.
A haven where depression and sorrow
Couldn't break through,
Where the trauma couldn't find me,
Where the stress couldn't consume me.
But how could I be so wrong?
Now I can't escape the nightmares
And sleep can't protect me anymore.
A split-second seems to pass from when
I close my eyes
Until I awake to face
The misery and dreadful world again.
My precious home of sleep,
I thought I could trust you,
But I grew up and was wrong.