Analysis of Weird but so real

I've been lying on the sand with a bullet in my head
Waiting nothing but the end, guess it's time to min amends

Maybe I will be a ghost I don't think it could be worse
Now I see you're not my fear, kicked you out you disappeared

I am tired of playing games and I'll neverbe be the same
Pull my strings your any way up and down, I'm not afraid

Maybe I will be on top maybe I will hit the floor
Maybe I'll be out of touch, maybe I just want too much

I don't want to feel you near, all I want you to believe
I'll be running to the light, I'll be always up to fight

You will never turn me blue I will never be with you
Had a choice but had no time, all you wanted now is mine

You will follow with the flood I will always be your blood
You'll be searching for the light, I'll be stalking you behind

You don't know how much it hurts and you'll never find the words
To explain me what you've done, better if you'd take a gun
Make a hole in your head and you're dead...