Adoration from afar

Upon thine eyes I seek for an amazed wonder,
Yet, I tried to conversate with no cause of dismay,
Still I saw the disappointment as I stepped towards the plane as thine husband agreed too,
Shook my head and raged over my own belief running to family for help to seek,
Instead of destroying what I believed to be highly important to many in belief,
Now instead I look and reminisce wondering what could I have done different,
So no longer do I worry about such unimportance,
Family is no longer my belief of what I used hold dear,
Only reliance on a faith closer than my fears even though my imperfections in conducting adherence to a faith rarely followed in ritual,
Still I enjoy the company I currently have because I no longer have the company I had,
In consequence to live a life with less dissent,
Even trying to change ways of how I was in being.