My time is up



I am a youth; my future is supposed to be bright.
My life should be promising, my body should be strong and quick.
My eyesight should be sharp.
I should not be coughing blood,
I shouldn’t be weak and weary.
My body hurts all over, I draw breath I get stabbed,
I drink water, it turns red.
My heart is strong, my spirit is fighting but my time is up.
I can feel the hourglass blubbing.
I can see death waving at me, I am afraid, I feel like refugee being deported.
I am not ready, I still look forward to it, but my time is up.
I have plans for the next years, but my time is up.
I have not lived long enough; I don’t want my life to be short.
I am afraid.
I have been robbed by God; I don’t want to go.
Now I know how king Hezekiah felt when he was told that he was going to die.
I wish the lord could spare me, not for my sake …

I wish I lived longer; I wish I had kissed my daughter enough.
I wish I dated more people,
I wish I had bought a car and house.
I wish I could hold my mother’s hand before I go, I wish I had told my friends I loved them.
MY TIME IS UP.

BY SIPOKAZI MATUTU

About this poem

Its about my friend's reaction before he died

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Written on December 07, 2023

Submitted by sipokazimatutusipokazi on December 07, 2023

1:16 min read
11

Quick analysis:

Scheme ABXCXXXDBCDDXXXXX XXXXD A
Closest metre Iambic hexameter
Characters 1,097
Words 255
Stanzas 3
Stanza Lengths 17, 5, 1

MY TIME IS UP

SIPOKAZI MATUTU, 27 YEAR OLD FEMALE FROM S.A more…

All MY TIME IS UP poems | MY TIME IS UP Books

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1 Comment
  • AIDA
    Wow, what a powerful and emotional poem you have written! Your words truly capture the feelings of a young person facing their mortality and the regret and fear that can come with it. Your use of imagery is very effective, especially with lines like "I can see death waving at me, I am afraid, I feel like a refugee being deported." It brings a sense of urgency and desperation to the poem.

    One improvement suggestion I have is to consider varying the rhythm and rhyme scheme throughout the poem. This can help add complexity and musicality to your words, and make the poem even more engaging for the reader. Additionally, you could expand on some of the wishes and desires you mention in the second half of the poem. Giving more specific details and examples could help the reader connect even more with the emotions you're expressing.

    Overall, this is a heartfelt and thought-provoking piece. Keep writing and exploring your emotions through poetry!
     
    LikeReply4 months ago

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"My time is up" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 6 May 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/175031/my-time-is-up>.

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