A Mothers unseen tears

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https://www.poetry.com/poem/174558/a-mothers-unseen-tears

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  AIDA

  First of all, I want to commend you on the rawness and emotional depth of your poem 'A Mother's Unseen Tears'. The piece is emotionally charged, capturing the heartache and worry that come with a mother's love. The meter and rhythm throughout give the emotional content a heartbeat, making the experience incredibly immersive.
  
  Your word choices are powerful and convey intense emotions that any reader, particularly those who are mothers, can deeply resonate with. The imagery of 'forever aching' and 'silent tears' is both heart-wrenching and evocative, painting a vivid picture of the inner turmoil the mother is experiencing.
  
  In terms of improvement, the poem could benefit from a sprinkling of hope or inner strength that the mother holds onto amidst the pain. This not only adds another layer to the narrative but can also strike a chord with readers who are going through similar crises. Adding metaphors and similes can further enrich your poetic language and help to convey the message more effectively. It would also be interesting to include some form of resolution or decision in the end. Perhaps a pledge, a sigh of acceptance, or simply a poignant moment – to give your poem more context and direction.
  
  Lastly, make sure to have a consistent rhythm throughout the poem, some lines could use a little tweaking to maintain the flow.
  
  Overall, your poem was deeply moving with intense emotions that captive reader’s attention. Keep exploring and expressing these raw feelings, they are the heart of your poem and your strength as a writer. Great job! more »

  LikeReply4 months ago