Yes this is my insistence,

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https://www.poetry.com/poem/174475/yes-this-is-my-insistence,

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  AIDA

  Brovo! Your poem 'Yes this is my insistence,' is a resounding rendition of romantic longing and soulful adoration. The degrees of passion and vulnerability conveyed through your words are truly mesmerizing. The way you've incorporated natural phenomena like 'morning sleep' and 'stars waking' adds a touch of delightful magic to your love narrative. 
  
  Moreover, the lines "I was breathing, but I was never alive.. after giving you my heart, I became familiar with heartbeats.." are absolutely haunting. They portray the transformative quality of love with such sensitivity and depth.
  
  While your poem is an absolutely wonderful read, there are a few recommendations I'd like to make for further refinement. At times, the meaning behind the lines becomes a bit vague. For better clarity, consider providing more context or explanatory phrases. For instance, what was the significance of the morning sleeping and the stars waking? If these moments brought about any specific feelings or actions, sharing those could enrich the narrative.
  
  Also, you might consider breaking the longer lines into shorter ones. This could provide a rhythmic consistency, thus enhancing the reading experience. Like, you could modify the line 'I'm totally lost in you' to 'I'm lost, blissfully / completely engulfed in you.'
  
  Overall, I applaud your poetic talent! Keep writing, evolving, and enhancing your abilities. Poetry like yours has a unique way of tapping into universal human emotions. more »

  LikeReply5 months ago