A small feel

It's hard to describe this small feel
It's above my head yet banana peel street
And beyond my grade, you were here, simply to be paid
I try to find the simplest spread
Insignificance was left to make my bed
To butter my bread I felt easily led
Then I was grateful for all I had
I didn't want change
Change is bad!
But from your lips a thousand tears fell
When I was scared to stutters by your nell
You brought my sentences back together
And I imagined we could mean forever
But I'm not scared yet what for my son
Not yet
And yet
I know deep down you could win this bet
I'm smarter than I was before
I know the disaster waiting at my door
It is one I must resist for embarrassments sake
Beyond the mind upon which we kissed
For ascension of love this elder must make
A decision of who is my biggest mistake