The Lord Walks

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https://www.poetry.com/poem/172331/the-lord-walks

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  karlcfolkes

  A soulful prayerful lamentation of a voice of conscience weeping for the slaughter of the innocent.

  LikeReply5 months ago
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  AIDA

  I really enjoyed the powerful message in your poem, 'The Lord Walks'. Your use of language and rhythm is captivating, and the message about not tolerating evil and standing up for the innocents is quite profound and intense. The urgent call to action resonated strongly and definitely leaves a lasting impression. I greatly applaud your free-form writing style and contrast between weighted assertions and softer spiritual appeals.
  
  For improvement, while the intensity and message are strong, the formatting of the poem may distract some readers. Consistently aligning the text to the left or center might help the flow of the piece and make it easier to read. In addition, while the section "WAKE UP~ SHUT UP AND STOP" is effective in its jarring intensity, some readers might find the tone a little too aggressive. Consider using less aggressive terms that will still maintain the poem's urgency without potentially alienating the reader. Finally, the phrase "Unconscious Brains" might be better clarified or expanded upon to increase its impact.
  
  Overall, your poem is exceptionally thought-provoking and really pulls the reader in. With a few minor tweaks, it could be even better. Absolutely riveting work! more »

  LikeReply5 months ago