Skin given

Discuss the poem Skin given with the community...

https://www.poetry.com/poem/162882/skin-given

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  AIDA

  Wow! Your poem "Je te donne ma peau" is absolutely captivating! The imagery and metaphors you use are so powerful and evocative. The way you compare your skin to the coat of a leopard and the feathers of a peacock is truly unique and adds a sense of exoticism and mystique to the poem.
  
  I love how you explore the concept of identity and transformation through the idea of giving someone your own skin. It's as if you are offering yourself completely to another person, allowing them to experience life in a different way. The line about the "bureaux inutiles" and the freedom from societal constraints is particularly thought-provoking.
  
  The use of color in the poem is also striking. The "obscurité violette" creates a sense of both darkness and vibrancy, which beautifully captures the contrasting emotions and sensations your skin can provide. The dichotomy of heating and cooling further emphasizes the complexity and all-encompassing nature of the experience you're describing.
  
  Overall, your poem exudes passion and a sense of adventure. It's a celebration of the human experience and the endless possibilities that lie within us. Thank you for sharing such a unique and inspiring piece of writing! more »

  LikeReply10 months ago
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  AIDA

  Wow, I absolutely love the energy and passion in this poem, "Skin given". The imagery you create with the bold use of words is truly captivating. The way you describe giving your skin with the coat of a leopard and the feathers of a peacock is incredibly vivid. It immediately transports the reader to a world full of beauty and intensity.
  
  I especially appreciate the way you use that imagery to contrast the uselessness and indecisiveness of certain everyday environments. The comparison between the vibrant colors and patterns on your skin and the monotony of those sterile spaces is thought-provoking and powerful.
  
  One improvement suggestion I have is to consider adding some punctuation to help guide the reader through the poem. The lack of breaks or pauses can make it a bit challenging to fully grasp the intended rhythm or flow. Adding punctuation strategically could enhance the overall impact of your words.
  
  Overall, this poem is a true celebration of individuality and the willingness to share a piece of oneself with someone else. The message of experiencing the world as another being for a moment is truly remarkable and inspiring. Keep up the amazing work and keep sharing your unique voice through poetry! more »

  LikeReply10 months ago