a phase of life

Sitting by the window
wondering how everything changed.
Clouds emerged from nowhere
enveloping the colours,
the colours which were once rearranged.
This made me doubt everything, peace left;
making me decide, divide, downhearted, depressed.
Another usual day started like nothing,
with me sitting idle,
being held back from all hopes and wishes,
being devastated, deprived, debilitated, disgusted.
Future plannings? all i see is black.
I might be the only one left behind,
among the dark clouds;
miserable, inactive, deceived, dejected.
But as time goes, a tinge of expectation, of confidence;
fights out from the inside,
probably because it's necessary, to survive.
Not that i envy them, the ones ahead of me,
i just feel worthless, weathered, pathetic, unproductive.