Kenopsia

Every night I lay awake
I count my blessings, give or take
Account for sins I've long forgot
Or try to pray for different thoughts.

Is there a God?
I do not know
But rivers ebb, and rivers flow,
The stars align
In constellations,
And hearts still beat for love's elation.

A Power Cosmic, Universal
Spirit that exists above
Creates, destroys with no regard
For emotions, hate nor love.

Thoughts, it seems, are transient-
A cerebral form of ambiance-
But leave behind a souvenir
That forces smiles, pulls for tears.

What is life?
For after death,
When darkness comes at our last breath,
Is there a Heaven?
Is there a Hell?
Will we fall as Lucifer fell?

Existential misery, the
Late-night dirge spreads like a cancer,
Dances through my mind at night
Yet nobody bleeds for the dancer.