perception

I yearned to see heaven
With my own eyes
To be free from this prison
Of insecurities and lies

But I’m beginning to wonder-
Is there a paradise?
Where do people go
When they fade with time?

I keep it to myself,
I don’t want to sound unwise.
I have enough internal voices,
I don’t need more from the outside.

I don’t want to let them in,
Don’t want to let them see me cry
It’s four in the morning,
And I’m waiting to die.