At least not with you

I deny the fact that I need you.
I deny the fact you can make weak.
I deny the fact that you give me butterflies.
I don’t want to fall in love again.
At least not with you.
Only because you’re bad for me.
You’re like the drug I can’t put down.
The drug I can’t ever say no to.
The drug I feel like I can’t live without.
But I gotta put you down.
I gotta say goodbye before this kills me.
But I want you to know a few things.
I want you to know that I think about you all the time.
I want you to know that I dream of our wedding day.
I want you to know that I dream of the day we have kids.
But sadly those things will never happen.
I deny the fact that I want you.
I deny the fact that I can’t sleep peacefully without you.
I deny the fact that I can’t live without you.
I don’t want to fall in love again.
At least with you.
I don’t want to get hurt again.
I don’t want to be left again.
I don’t want to cry over you anymore.
It’s not fair.
You left me.
You chose another girl over me.
And it will always be like that.
I cannot compare.
So I’m walking away now.
I deny the fact that you have my heart.
I deny the fact that you make my mind spin.
I deny the fact that I love you.
I don’t want to fall in love again.
At least not with you.

~Maroon Tatum~ 9/24/2019, 17 Years Old.