Unloved

I wish I was the one my mom loved and cherished but I would be better off if I just perished, she treats me like I'm not in existence she builds the wall to keep me in the distance, she shuns me to the rest excludes me because I'm not the best, she lies about me to one or another the one she loves the most is my brother, he's her first child he's troubled, psychotic and wild, all her days are spent trying to keep him sated and soothed, I'm the one that is hated and removed, I wish she loved all her children the same but she doesn't and I'm the one to blame.