Analysis of Peter the Wag
POLICEMAN PETER FORTH I drag
From his obscure retreat:
He was a merry genial wag,
Who loved a mad conceit.
If he were asked the time of day,
By country bumpkins green,
He not unfrequently would say,
"A quarter past thirteen."
If ever you by word of mouth
Inquired of MISTER FORTH
The way to somewhere in the South,
He always sent you North.
With little boys his beat along
He loved to stop and play;
He loved to send old ladies wrong,
And teach their feet to stray.
He would in frolic moments, when
Such mischief bent upon,
Take Bishops up as betting men -
Bid Ministers move on.
Then all the worthy boys he knew
He regularly licked,
And always collared people who
Had had their pockets picked.
He was not naturally bad,
Or viciously inclined,
But from his early youth he had
A waggish turn of mind.
The Men of London grimly scowled
With indignation wild;
The Men of London gruffly growled,
But PETER calmly smiled.
Against this minion of the Crown
The swelling murmurs grew -
From Camberwell to Kentish Town -
From Rotherhithe to Kew.
Still humoured he his wagsome turn,
And fed in various ways
The coward rage that dared to burn,
But did not dare to blaze.
Still, Retribution has her day,
Although her flight is slow:
ONE DAY THAT CRUSHER LOST HIS WAY
NEAR POLAND STREET, SOHO.
The haughty boy, too proud to ask,
To find his way resolved,
And in the tangle of his task
Got more and more involved.
The Men of London, overjoyed,
Came there to jeer their foe,
And flocking crowds completely cloyed
The mazes of Soho.
The news on telegraphic wires
Sped swiftly o'er the lea,
Excursion trains from distant shires
Brought myriads to see.
For weeks he trod his self-made beats
Through Newport- Gerrard- Bear-
Greek- Rupert- Frith- Dean- Poland- Streets,
And into Golden Square.
But all, alas! in vain, for when
He tried to learn the way
Of little boys or grown-up men,
They none of them would say.
Their eyes would flash - their teeth would grind -
Their lips would tightly curl -
They'd say, "Thy way thyself must find,
Thou misdirecting churl!"
And, similarly, also, when
He tried a foreign friend;
Italians answered, "IL BALEN" -
The French, "No comprehend."
The Russ would say with gleaming eye
" Sevastopol!" and groan.
The Greek said, [GREEK TEXT WHICH CANNOT
BE REPRODUCED]."
To wander thus for many a year
That Crusher never ceased -
The Men of London dropped a tear,
Their anger was appeased.
At length exploring gangs were sent
To find poor FORTH'S remains -
A handsome grant by Parliament
Was voted for their pains.
To seek the poor policeman out
Bold spirits volunteered,
And when they swore they'd solve the doubt,
The Men of London cheered.
And in a yard, dark, dank, and drear,
They found him, on the floor -
It leads from Richmond Buildings - near
The Royalty stage-door.
With brandy cold and brandy hot
They plied him, starved and wet,
And made him sergeant on the spot -
The Men of London's pet!
Scheme | ABABCDCD EFEFGCGC HIHIJKJK LMLMNONO PJPJQRQR CSCSTUTU XSBSXVXV WXWXHCHC MXMSHYDY XXZX1 XXX X2 X2 3 4 3 4 X5 1 5 Z6 Z6 |
---|---|
Poetic Form | |
Metre | 01010111 110101 11010101 110101 11010111 11011 11111 010111 11011111 0101101 0111001 11111 11011101 111101 11111101 011111 11010101 110101 11011101 110011 11010111 110001 0110101 111101 11110001 110001 11110111 01111 01110101 10101 01110101 110101 01110101 010101 11111 1111 111111 0101001 01011111 111111 1010101 10111 11110111 110110 01011111 111101 00010111 110101 0111001 111111 01010101 010110 011110 1101001 01011101 1111 11111111 11011 11011101 001101 11010111 111101 11011111 111111 11111111 111101 1111111 111 01000101 110101 0101011 01101 01111101 101 01111110 101 110111001 110101 01110101 110101 11010101 111101 01011100 110111 11010101 11001 01111101 011101 00011101 111101 11110101 010011 11010101 111101 01110101 011101 |
Closest metre | Iambic tetrameter |
Characters | 2,821 |
Words | 532 |
Sentences | 28 |
Stanzas | 12 |
Stanza Lengths | 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8, 8 |
Lines Amount | 96 |
Letters per line (avg) | 24 |
Words per line (avg) | 5 |
Letters per stanza (avg) | 189 |
Words per stanza (avg) | 44 |
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Submitted on May 13, 2011
Modified on March 05, 2023
- 2:39 min read
- 45 Views
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"Peter the Wag" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 29 Apr. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem-analysis/41256/peter-the-wag>.
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