Put a Penny in the Slot
William Schwenck Gilbert 1836 – 1911
If my action's stiff and crude,
Do not laugh, because it's rude.
If my gestures promise larks,
Do not make unkind remarks.
Clockwork figures may be found
Everywhere and all around.
Ten to one, if I but knew,
You are clockwork figures too.
And the motto of the lot,
"Put a penny in the slot!"
Usurer, for money lent,
Making out his cent per cent -
Widow plump or maiden rare,
Deaf and dumb to suitor's prayer -
Tax collectors, whom in vain
You implore to "call again" -
Cautious voter, whom you find
Slow in making up his mind -
If you'd move them on the spot,
Put a penny in the slot!
Bland reporters in the courts,
Who suppress police reports -
Sheriff's yeoman, pen in fist,
Making out a jury list -
Stern policemen, tall and spare,
Acting all "upon the square" -
(Which in words that plainer fall,
Means that you can square them all) -
If you want to move the lot,
Put a penny in the slot!
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Submitted on May 13, 2011
Modified on March 05, 2023
- 54 sec read
- 41 Views
Quick analysis:
Scheme | aabbccddeE ffggxxhheE iijjggkkeE |
---|---|
Closest metre | Iambic tetrameter |
Characters | 871 |
Words | 176 |
Stanzas | 3 |
Stanza Lengths | 10, 10, 10 |
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"Put a Penny in the Slot" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 23 Apr. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/41260/put-a-penny-in-the-slot>.
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