Treat 'Em Rough



First time I dared propose,
          A callow lad was I;
I donned my Sunday clothes,
          I wore my Old School Tie.
Awaiting me Louise
          Was dolled to beat the band,
So going on my knees
          I begged her hand.

Oh yes, she gave me her hand,--
          A box upon the ear;
I could not understand,
          I blinked away a tear.
Then scornfully she said:
          'Next time you kneel before
A maid, young man don't spread
          Your hankey on the floor.'

So next time I proposed,
          Thinks I, I'll treat 'em rough.
Her name was Lily Rose,
          I gave her he-man stuff.
I yanked her on my knee,
          And as her ear I bit,
To my amazement she
          Seemed to like it.

The old cave-men knew best;
          Grab girlies by the hair,
And though they may protest
          Drag them into your lair.
So young men seeking mates,
          Take my tip, if rejected:
A modern maid just hates
          To be respected.

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Submitted on May 13, 2011

Modified on March 05, 2023

49 sec read
92

Quick analysis:

Scheme ABXBCDCD DXDEFGFG XHAHIJIJ KEKELMLM
Closest metre Iambic trimeter
Characters 933
Words 163
Stanzas 4
Stanza Lengths 8, 8, 8, 8

Robert William Service

Robert William Service was a poet and writer sometimes referred to as the Bard of the Yukon He is best-known for his writings on the Canadian North including the poems The Shooting of Dan McGrew The Law of the Yukon and The Cremation of Sam McGee His writing was so expressive that his readers took him for a hard-bitten old Klondike prospector not the later-arriving bank clerk he actually was Robert William Service was born 16 January 1874 in Preston England but also lived in Scotland before emigrating to Canada in 1894 Service went to the Yukon Territory in 1904 as a bank clerk and became famous for his poems about this region which are mostly in his first two books of poetry He wrote quite a bit of prose as well and worked as a reporter for some time but those writings are not nearly as well known as his poems He travelled around the world quite a bit and narrowly escaped from France at the beginning of the Second World War during which time he lived in Hollywood California He died 11 September 1958 in France Incidentally he played himself in a movie called The Spoilers starring John Wayne and Marlene Dietrich more…

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