Sensitive Burglar

Selecting in the dining-room
  The silver of his choice,
The burglar heard from chamber gloom
  A female voice.
As cold and bitter as a toad,
  She spat a nasty name,
So even as his swag he stowed
  He blushed for shame.

'You dirty dog!' he heard her say,
  'I sniff your whisky stench.
I bet you've gambled half your pay,
  Or blown it on a wench.
Begone from here, you rakehell boor!
  You shame the human race.
What wife would pillow-share with your
  Disgusting face!'

A tear the tender burglar shed,
  Then indignation rose,
And swiftly striding to her bed
  He said: 'I'm none of those.
I am a connoisseur in crime
  And felonies I plan . . .
But otherwise, believe me I'm
  A GENTLEMAN.'

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"Sensitive Burglar" Poetry.net. STANDS4 LLC, 2020. Web. 2 Jun 2020. <https://www.poetry.net/poem/32430/sensitive-burglar>.

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