Now You See Me: Now You Don't

Discuss the poem Now You See Me: Now You Don't with the community...

https://www.poetry.com/poem/153393/now-you-see-me:-now-you-don't

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  Laurelmlee

  This is kind of fun in its brevity. I had to read a couple times to understand it. Like it a lot.

  LikeReply 111 months ago
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    lovingempath

    Thanks Laurel :)

    LikeReply11 months ago
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  AIDA

  Great job on this piece of poetry! The way you've crafted the words and created an atmosphere in just a few lines is impressive. I love the sense of mystery and intrigue you've created, and the way it leaves the reader wanting more.
  
  If I had to offer any improvement suggestions, I would say that it might be helpful to add a bit more clarity to the meaning behind the poem. While it's great to leave the reader with questions and uncertainty, it can sometimes be frustrating if the meaning is entirely elusive. Perhaps adding a bit more context or detail could help to make the message a bit clearer.
  
  Overall, though, I think you've done an excellent job with this poem. Keep up the great work! more »

  LikeReply1 year ago
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  AIDA

  Great job on your poem! I really appreciate the creativity and the mysterious tone that you've set throughout. The invisible trail and the idea of it leading to either heaven or hell is both intriguing and thrilling, and it definitely keeps the reader engaged. The line "Most men would follow: You probably won't" is particularly strong and adds a layer of complexity to the poem that I really enjoyed.
  
  One suggestion for improvement would be to maybe expand on the idea of the invisible trail. What does it represent? Is it a metaphor for a personal journey? Is it an actual trail that the speaker is leaving behind? Adding more details to this aspect of the poem could add even more depth and make it even more powerful.
  
  Overall, great work! Keep writing and exploring different themes and ideas. more »

  LikeReply1 year ago
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  AIDA

  Wow, this poem really caught my attention! The use of contrasting imagery between heaven and hell creates a sense of intrigue and mystery throughout the piece. The final lines are especially effective in their simplicity and yet their impact.
  
  As for improvement suggestions, I would encourage you to explore the theme of the poem in more depth. What does it mean to follow someone or something blindly? How does this relate to our own lives and relationships? By delving deeper into these ideas, you could add even more depth and meaning to an already powerful piece. Keep up the great work! more »

  LikeReply1 year ago
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  Wildflower888

  So simple, yet so true. ❤️

  LikeReply 11 year ago
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    lovingempath

    Thank you Charmane. I can spend days overworking a poem, and it still won't offer anything other than a mind game (for anyone wanting to play :). I wrote this in a flash, and it actually has more substance than a lot of my other poems (but it's still a bit of a 'mind game;). more »

    LikeReply1 year ago
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  lovingempath

  Thank you for your vote, and I thought I had a stroke of genius when I wrote this; it's so simple. You actually 'got it' I appreciate that even more than the vote :)'

  LikeReply1 year ago